I have a very early memory of being with a gang of boys in the street. I suppose I was about four-years old. I had just discovered peer pressure and how people sometimes viewed you as being a bit of a “cissy” or girly if you weren’t as nasty as the rest of the boys. It wasn’t a particularly dangerous neighbourhood, but people could often be verbally cruel.
There was this older overweight girl, and they all started calling her “fatty”. But I was appalled at their behaviour, and I went up to the girl and said, “I don’t think you’re a fatty”. She’d been upset, and suddenly her face brightened, and she smiled and thanked me. It’s just something that stuck in my mind. I can’t say that I always resisted peer pressure. Boys wanted to be viewed as being tough, but you can be tough without being nasty.
As I grew older, it was always a joy to me to see seemingly tough or cool people embracing kindness. I used to be big into punk rock as a 16-year-old, and so much of that was full of nastiness. I remember one 1978 song going against the tide.
As I walk through this wicked world, Searchin' for light in the darkness of insanity
I ask myself, "Is all hope lost? Is there only pain and hatred and misery?"
And each time I feel like this inside There's one thing I wanna know, What's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding?
It’s said that Nick Lowe, the man who wrote the song a few years before the punk/new wave era, meant it ironically, but eventually embraced its message. A lot of the punk songs had a moral tone to them, but most songs lashed out at other people. Few focused on the evil within. An exception is the 1982 song Carnation by the Jam, which was covered by Liam Gallagher and Steve Craddock in 1999. The lyrics paint a portrait of a deeply narcissistic and destructive individual, but end with the following lines:
And if you're wondering by now who I am
Look no further than the mirror -
Because I am the Greed and Fear
And every ounce of Hate in you.
In 2017, Paul Weller, name his album A Kind Revolution. It was a joy to see that title because so often, politically minded rock stars come across as hateful and envious.
One of my favourite New Testament instances is how the dying thief went against the tide of cruelty shown to Jesus. Judas had betrayed Jesus, Peter denied him three times, his disciples deserted him, and Jews and Romans united to torture him. Even the thieves dying alongside him initially scoffed at his claims to be the Messiah. But then something changed:
Luke 23:39-43
39 One of the criminals who hung there hurled insults at him: “Aren’t you the Messiah? Save yourself and us!” 40 But the other criminal rebuked him. “Don’t you fear God,” he said, “since you are under the same sentence? 41 We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong.” 42 Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” 43 Jesus answered him, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.”
And I think of earlier words from Jesus on the theme of not going along with the crowd:
Matt 7:13-15
13 “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. 14 But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.
So I’ll close with four songs. The first two are from Bob Dylan. Dylan was subjected to huge peer pressure by the trendy left, who were very disappointed when he gave his life to Christ. I found these songs quite inspiring when I went against the grain and committed my life to Christ. It’s true that some objected and felt Dylan was being a bit unfair. Maybe the songs are more of a protest to that part of him that wanted to be trendy. Peer pressure, and the desire to be seen as cool is a very powerful thing.
Here are two old hymns, one about the importance of self-examination and the other about standing up for Jesus.
Hibernia Gospel 